Design by Anisa Cleaver

Much like scissoring, the almighty strap-on is such an iconic symbol of queerness that even if you’ve never used one before, chances are, you’ve seen one in a film or joked about them with your friends before. Perhaps you’ve also been tempted to give one a go, but find all the strap options, sizes and colours a little overwhelming, and the whole thing a bit confusing. We don’t blame you – there’s lots going on in the strap-on world.

Fortunately, GAY TIMES has created a guide to everything you need to know about how to use a strap-on and strap-on sex: from selecting the right equipment, to getting down and dirty, and cleaning up afterwards.

What is a strap-on and who are strap-ons for?

A strap-on is a dildo that straps onto the body, usually with a harness, to be used during sexual activity. The long-standing perception is that strap-ons are for lesbians or two people with vaginas. Gigi Engle, clinical sexologist and lead intimacy expert for dating app 3fun tells GAY TIMES that the draw to strap-ons for people with vulvas can be down to a couple of different dynamics.

“Maybe you want to wear a strap-on because you want to express dominance, or try penetration,” she explains. “You may also want to try a strap-on because your partner might enjoy penetration but doesn’t necessarily want to be with a person who has a penis.”

However, not all couples with vaginas are into using strap-ons. And in reality, strap-on sex is for literally anyone who fancies giving it a go. This includes penis-owners.

Engle explains that, along with providing an option for penetrative sex to those with vulvas, strap-ons are great for anyone regardless of their genitalia, especially if they’re interested in pegging or anal play.