Words by JJ Croucher
Design by Yosef Phelan

You can scroll through reams and reams of the same content: an engorged 8-incher head-to-head against an appendage less than half its size; a solo post – legs akimbo, an endless shaft, the neck cut off at the shoulders, a flexed bicep, maybe; someone is kneeling, there's a coyness to their pose, their penis rests in their lap like a button mushroom. The captions are uniform too: the doms write things like “Are men created equal?" or “You'll never be a real man”. For the subs, it's usually the simple imperative – “Humiliate me.”

The forums are plentiful, but their goal is singular: for people who like to be made fun of for the size of their penises, there is no better town square than the internet; for those that like to humiliate others and relish in their own stature, willing participants are but a few clicks away.

I want to understand the world of ‘Small Penis Humiliation’, the rigidity of its roles and its relationship to masculinity and the body. I pen my own post asking for help. Before I can submit it, I need to choose a tag. I dither – it's not an “ass pic” and I'm not chaste – not “looking for a key holder”. I don't want to be humiliated either, nor would I label myself a “Cuck”.

I choose “Alpha Cock” and press 'post'...

...if I'm asking the questions, surely the power's in my hands. 

Everyone that I speak to seems to have a different definition of what small-penis humiliation is. The guys I make contact with refer to it almost exclusively as ‘SPH’, delivering the acronym off-hand, as though it were a type of mixed martial arts or a Big-Five consultancy firm. They're clearly well acquainted with the world and its lingo – I soon learn that smaller dicks are called ‘bics’, after the lighters. 

"It is really just about feeling pathetic.”

In the most basic sense, small-penis humiliation is a kink; this kink is based on the feeling of sexual gratification garnered by having one's penis scrutinised and belittled and the resulting sense of humiliation. On the flipside, people – who are typically bigger – can derive gratification from delivering this humiliation; they often embody the role of the scathing locker-room jock. “Bro, what the fuck is that,” they might say while flopping about a more-enviable member.

Alvaro, a 25-year-old bisexual student from Spain, and forum frequenter, tells me that the dynamic bred by the big-versus-small comparison creates a sense of admiration, and considers SPH a synthesis of the type of messaging he is exposed to in day-to-day life. He says that while seeing pictures of guys with big dicks in real life is safe, Small-Penis Humiliation flips this on its head: when no longer eyeing-up impossible bulges in Instagram thirst-traps, Alvaro tells me he gets a sense of release – the overt humiliation associated with having his own penis evaluated takes away the simmering societal pressure to be big. While we speak, he is the one taking notes; he has an alternative perspective too – “Sometimes it can be funny,” he says, nodding to himself, and scribbling this insight down.